Late last night, I was laying in bed and I decided that I wanted to change how I ran my business. My role as a celebrant is an important role which carries some weighty responsibilities that I take very seriously. But my business doesn’t have to be something that is too serious. Because, well, I’m not.
From this day forward, I won’t be sending out ceremony examples to any new clients, this isn’t to ‘protect’ my words, but because I feel that the bride and groom are the only ones that can own their ceremony. And thats the same reson why all new clients and I are going to work from scratch, each and every time.
I have lots of readings and poetry in my database, which we can chat about, I have lots of nice fluffy things to add in about Marriage and how awesome it is, but I want to make sure my clients are approaching their ceremony nice and fresh.
One of the tricky things about ceremony writing is that not many people know what they want to include, do they write their own vows? What order should everything go in? Is there stuff you have to say?
There are a few hard and fast rules.
You have to say your full names, I have a dorky middle name and no matter how much I hate it, I had to say it for my marriage to be legal.
I HAVE to say the Monitum:
My name is Bianca Way and I am duly authorised by law to solemnise marriages according to law. Bride and Groom before you are joined in marriage in my presence and in the presence ofthese witnesses, I am to remind you of the solemn and binding nature of the relationship into which you are now about to enter. Marriage according to the law in Australia, is the union of a man and a woman to the exclusion of all others, voluntarily entered into for life.
You HAVE to say these vows:
I call upon persons here present to witness that I, (Groom Groomy Groom), take you, (Bride Bridey Bride) to be my lawful wedded wife
I call upon persons here present to witness that I, (Bride Bridey Bride) take you, (Groom Groomy Groom) to be my lawful wedded husband
Do you have to write more vows of your own? Not technically, but gee it is nice 🙂
Do you have to give rings? No, not if you don’t want to
Do you have to be ‘given away’? Nope, not unless you want to
Is there a specific order? No, but I do have a basic format that I use, depending on what you would like included.
Do I really have to say the Monitum? YES and I’ll explain why in another post.
Your ceremony is yours, my job is to help it be everything you want, and to make sure its legal. One of the best parts of my job is trawling through the internet finding new and unusual rituals, traditions, song lyrics, movie quotes and of course writing as much as I can myself.
I throw around the word ‘Organic” when I am chatting to clients, because I feel that you, your guests, and I need to feel like everything that is being said is true, real and organic to ourselves. Aside from the above few sentences, its all yours.
The photo above was one of my most unique ceremonies, Rene and Alex had their puppy in their bridal party and I was 8 months pregnant at the time! They also had the poem “Falling in love is like owning a dog”
“Falling in love is like owning a dog,”
First of all, it’s a big responsibility,
So think long and hard before deciding on love. On cold winter nights, love is warm. It lies between you and lives and breathes and makes funny noises. Love wakes you up all hours of the night with its needs. It needs to be fed so it will grow and stay healthy.
Love doesn’t like being left alone for long. But come home and love is always happy to see you. It may break a few things accidentally in its passion for life, but you can never be mad at love for long.
Love makes messes. Love leaves you little surprises here and there. Love needs lots of cleaning up after. Sometimes you just want to get love fixed. Sometimes you want to roll up a piece of newspaper and swat love on the nose, not so much to cause pain, just to let love know Don’t you ever do that again!
Sometimes love just wants to go for a nice long walk, because love loves exercise. It runs you around the block and leaves you panting. It pulls you in several different directions at once, or winds around and around you until you’re all wound up and can’t move.
Throw things away and love will bring them back, again, and again, and again. But most of all, love needs love, lots of it. And in return, love loves you and never stops”.